Wednesday, October 03, 2007
Performance Enhancing Substances
Hot damn that Viper Extract and Royal Jelly is a killer combo. Chugged a bottle of it last night, and one this morning, and I could barely feel the cold through the overwhelming genkiness flowing through my veins. Got through 6 classes at the loudest elementary school around without problems, even though they made me go out and play with the kids during recess. Of course now that I'm home and sedentary, I feel like I'm about to crash for a year or two... get me some snake juice stat!
Tuesday, October 02, 2007
I'm gonna die tomorrow
Man when stuff turns on you it really all goes at once doesn't it. This week is the first week in like a month where I have to work a full 5 days. Add to that a wicked head cold that is about to turn into a wicked fever. And finally, tomorrow, already exhausted from being sick, I have to teach 6 full classes at the noisiest elementary school in the area. Basically, I'm going to get to school at 8:30, immediately be surrounded by a bunch of kids, and then used as a human jungle gym while vainly trying to get them to repeat words in English. All until they leave school at 3. I hope I at least get a bunch of them sick.
I don't think I'm gonna get much sympathy from the Board of Education either should I try and pull a sick day. My boss just gave me detailed instructions to go to the local drugstore, get a bottle of children's cold medicine and a energy drink, and chug them both before I go to bed tonight. We'll see how it works!
EDIT: Just got a bottle of "Yunker Kotei" which my supervisor recommended I take. Check out the ingredients:
Viper Tincture 100mg
Civet Tincture 250mg
Bezoar Tincture 250mg
Ginseng Extract 10mg
Crataegus Extract 3mg
Rehmannia Dried Extract 30mg
Royal Jelly 100mg
and then some boring vitamins that don't sound like they will kill me
I don't think I'm gonna get much sympathy from the Board of Education either should I try and pull a sick day. My boss just gave me detailed instructions to go to the local drugstore, get a bottle of children's cold medicine and a energy drink, and chug them both before I go to bed tonight. We'll see how it works!
EDIT: Just got a bottle of "Yunker Kotei" which my supervisor recommended I take. Check out the ingredients:
Viper Tincture 100mg
Civet Tincture 250mg
Bezoar Tincture 250mg
Ginseng Extract 10mg
Crataegus Extract 3mg
Rehmannia Dried Extract 30mg
Royal Jelly 100mg
and then some boring vitamins that don't sound like they will kill me
Monday, September 03, 2007
My Car
It took just about 13 months in Japan for me to finally find a car I like and then get it in my possession here in Takahagi. Here it is:
It's a 1993 Toyota Mark II Tourer V. I want to try and explain this car since most people back home haven't heard of it. It's a 4 door rear wheel drive midsize sedan with the 1JZ-GTE twin turbo 2.5L engine. Trying to compare it to cars people know, in terms of basic layout and size it seems similar to the BMW 5 series or Nissan Skyline sedans of the time. The exterior length is 187.0 inches, width is 68.9, and height is 54.7. The wheelbase is 107.5 inches and the curb weight is 3190 lbs. All of those dimensions put it pretty close to a 5 series of the time, or if you like a '93 Nissan Maxima. Or, what most people most commonly mistake it for... a Toyota Camry. Here's a stock Camry and stock Mark II for comparison:
It has a longer wheelbase, but yeah, lookswise I guess it is pretty close. I think the slight differences do make a better overall image. And, of course, the layout makes it a completely different car, which is why I think the comparison to the BMW 5 series is more accurate. And I don't think MY car looks much like a Camry. The Mark II was a high volume seller for Japan just like the Camry was in America, and you can see many ordinary Mark IIs, like the Grande (lol) above. Context is also slightly different, as a car of this size with RWD was more upmarket and executive in Japan's smaller scale world, whereas the visually similar Camry with FWD was a family car perfectly suited to Americans.
Next is that last part of the nameplate, the Tourer V. I'm not sure where they got the V part from, but it means that the Mark II Tourer V is the sportiest sedan Toyota made at the time. Two other Toyota sedans could also carry the Tourer V badge, the Chaser and the Cresta. Actually, all three cars (collectively called the Mark II brothers here in Japan) were basically the same, with slightly different front and rear lights and grille, and other minor changes, like the Cresta's full frame doors. The Cresta was considered the most luxurious of the three, and the Chaser the sportiest, with the Mark II in the middle, but mechanically all three cars were identical in terms of engine, drivetrain, and suspension. People complain about GM badge engineering identical cars under different brands, but at least they had different brands. Toyota sold three cars that were exactly the same under one brand! 
Back to that engine... the 1JZ-GTE is a twin turbo 2.5 litre engine that also saw duty in the last model year of the 3rd gen Supra here, as well as the fastest Toyota Soarer. A non-turbo version of this engine was in the Lexus SC300. The block of the 1JZ is actually pretty close to the 2JZ, the all powerful heart of the 4th gen Supra. There are of course other differences. The 2JZ-GTE's turbos are sequential, and the 1JZ-GTE's are not, which means the 1JZ-GTE has much more turbo lag. Both the 1JZ-GTE and the 2JZ-GTE were listed as 276 hp factory, both at the legal limit for Japan, and both considered lower than the actual power figures, although the Supra's 2JZ-GTE was probably the more conservative of the two. Sorry for the crappy comparison picture, but I don't have a scanner so I just had to use my camera to get this pic out of my copy of Hyper Rev for the Mark II. Drivetrain and suspension changes rounded out the upgrade to Tourer V status, but I don't have a lot of hard info on what changed there exactly. I think that's enough for now, even though I haven't actually said much about my own car, just the Mark II model. But I wanted to give everyone a good idea of the car itself before I talk about my car specifically. Here's one more pic of my car until next time:
It's a 1993 Toyota Mark II Tourer V. I want to try and explain this car since most people back home haven't heard of it. It's a 4 door rear wheel drive midsize sedan with the 1JZ-GTE twin turbo 2.5L engine. Trying to compare it to cars people know, in terms of basic layout and size it seems similar to the BMW 5 series or Nissan Skyline sedans of the time. The exterior length is 187.0 inches, width is 68.9, and height is 54.7. The wheelbase is 107.5 inches and the curb weight is 3190 lbs. All of those dimensions put it pretty close to a 5 series of the time, or if you like a '93 Nissan Maxima. Or, what most people most commonly mistake it for... a Toyota Camry. Here's a stock Camry and stock Mark II for comparison:
It has a longer wheelbase, but yeah, lookswise I guess it is pretty close. I think the slight differences do make a better overall image. And, of course, the layout makes it a completely different car, which is why I think the comparison to the BMW 5 series is more accurate. And I don't think MY car looks much like a Camry. The Mark II was a high volume seller for Japan just like the Camry was in America, and you can see many ordinary Mark IIs, like the Grande (lol) above. Context is also slightly different, as a car of this size with RWD was more upmarket and executive in Japan's smaller scale world, whereas the visually similar Camry with FWD was a family car perfectly suited to Americans.
Next is that last part of the nameplate, the Tourer V. I'm not sure where they got the V part from, but it means that the Mark II Tourer V is the sportiest sedan Toyota made at the time. Two other Toyota sedans could also carry the Tourer V badge, the Chaser and the Cresta. Actually, all three cars (collectively called the Mark II brothers here in Japan) were basically the same, with slightly different front and rear lights and grille, and other minor changes, like the Cresta's full frame doors. The Cresta was considered the most luxurious of the three, and the Chaser the sportiest, with the Mark II in the middle, but mechanically all three cars were identical in terms of engine, drivetrain, and suspension. People complain about GM badge engineering identical cars under different brands, but at least they had different brands. Toyota sold three cars that were exactly the same under one brand! 
Back to that engine... the 1JZ-GTE is a twin turbo 2.5 litre engine that also saw duty in the last model year of the 3rd gen Supra here, as well as the fastest Toyota Soarer. A non-turbo version of this engine was in the Lexus SC300. The block of the 1JZ is actually pretty close to the 2JZ, the all powerful heart of the 4th gen Supra. There are of course other differences. The 2JZ-GTE's turbos are sequential, and the 1JZ-GTE's are not, which means the 1JZ-GTE has much more turbo lag. Both the 1JZ-GTE and the 2JZ-GTE were listed as 276 hp factory, both at the legal limit for Japan, and both considered lower than the actual power figures, although the Supra's 2JZ-GTE was probably the more conservative of the two. Sorry for the crappy comparison picture, but I don't have a scanner so I just had to use my camera to get this pic out of my copy of Hyper Rev for the Mark II. Drivetrain and suspension changes rounded out the upgrade to Tourer V status, but I don't have a lot of hard info on what changed there exactly. I think that's enough for now, even though I haven't actually said much about my own car, just the Mark II model. But I wanted to give everyone a good idea of the car itself before I talk about my car specifically. Here's one more pic of my car until next time:
Monday, July 09, 2007
惜しいなぁ
My life these days:
USS Auction
Toyota -> Search
CORONA MARK-2 -> Go
More Info -> Go
Model -> JZX90
Transmission -> MT
Toyota -> Search
CHASER -> Go
More Info -> Go
Model -> JZX90
Transmission -> MT
Toyota -> Search
SOARER -> Go
More Info -> Go
Model -> JZZ30
Transmission -> MT
Bid
Lose
:(
Right now I'm trying to decide if a heavily modified Mark II is a good deal for me. It's got a full roll cage, GT wing, full aero, intake, exhaust, coilovers, racing seats, intercooler, gauges, 18" alloys... it's pretty hot. Oh also almost a year of shaken. Issues? Yeah there are plenty of those too, not all the fault of the car though. It's not in the best shape exterior wise, plenty of dings and scrapes, plus a bit of rust in one of the wheel wells. It's rated R on the auction site, which means it could have been in a crash, or just that adding all those parts qualifies as "repairs." I'm not sure how much I really need to be concerned with the condition of the car though, really. Unless it's going to need major repairs that will cost me, I think what's more important is figuring out what the resale value of the car will be in a year or two, and how much of a hit I am willing to take on that. But besides that, I was looking forward to getting a relatively clean stock car and choosing how to modify it myself. This would be buying a car already in the last stages, with all the work done for me, but no longer really "my" car. The other issue, unfortunately, is that I don't think it would be a very good idea for me to drive around my inaka town of 30,000 people in a car that would draw that much attention. I already get more than enough. But it's frustrating, because if I was living anywhere else, I wouldn't care, because I could still be anonymous. I guess I could just throw like a 5% tint on all the glass? What probably would end up happening is I would remove the wing and probably the roll cage, which wouldn't be that bad of a compromise. I dunno.
USS Auction
Toyota -> Search
CORONA MARK-2 -> Go
More Info -> Go
Model -> JZX90
Transmission -> MT
Toyota -> Search
CHASER -> Go
More Info -> Go
Model -> JZX90
Transmission -> MT
Toyota -> Search
SOARER -> Go
More Info -> Go
Model -> JZZ30
Transmission -> MT
Bid
Lose
:(
Right now I'm trying to decide if a heavily modified Mark II is a good deal for me. It's got a full roll cage, GT wing, full aero, intake, exhaust, coilovers, racing seats, intercooler, gauges, 18" alloys... it's pretty hot. Oh also almost a year of shaken. Issues? Yeah there are plenty of those too, not all the fault of the car though. It's not in the best shape exterior wise, plenty of dings and scrapes, plus a bit of rust in one of the wheel wells. It's rated R on the auction site, which means it could have been in a crash, or just that adding all those parts qualifies as "repairs." I'm not sure how much I really need to be concerned with the condition of the car though, really. Unless it's going to need major repairs that will cost me, I think what's more important is figuring out what the resale value of the car will be in a year or two, and how much of a hit I am willing to take on that. But besides that, I was looking forward to getting a relatively clean stock car and choosing how to modify it myself. This would be buying a car already in the last stages, with all the work done for me, but no longer really "my" car. The other issue, unfortunately, is that I don't think it would be a very good idea for me to drive around my inaka town of 30,000 people in a car that would draw that much attention. I already get more than enough. But it's frustrating, because if I was living anywhere else, I wouldn't care, because I could still be anonymous. I guess I could just throw like a 5% tint on all the glass? What probably would end up happening is I would remove the wing and probably the roll cage, which wouldn't be that bad of a compromise. I dunno.
Friday, June 15, 2007
it takes 72 muscles to smile and say good morning
Yeah, I made that fact up. But, this Tuesday, although I was scheduled to work at a school, I instead had to show up bright and early at the train station in the middle of town for a "aisatsu undou" aka exercising greetings. This basically consisted of me wearing a smart little red sash and white armband, both proclaiming my allegiance to my town's Board of Education, and giving an enthusiastic "good morning!" (in Japanese of course) to everyone that passed by the train station entrance for a good 45 minutes. It was pretty hot for 8 AM, and the sun was in my eyes the entire time, but I still kind of enjoyed myself, certainly more than I would have if I had to teach that day. (I still love my main school.) That afternoon I got to go watch the tail end of the basketball tournament for all of Takahagi, and I got to see my kids beat up on another school. That was literally the entirety of my job duties for that day. Say hello to a hundred or so people in the morning, then watch some 15 year olds play basketball in the afternoon. It's great. I feel guilty that I don't help out more with basketball though. The old basketball coach got transfered to elementary school (which is hilarious, this guy does not seem like he is well suited to dealing with 10 year olds at all) and the new coach is one of the Japanese Teachers of English, who asked me to help her with the team, but I've been shirking that responsibility way too much. Luckily the boys basketball team is ridiculously strong (they beat every other team by at least 30 points) so they will be moving on to the northern prefectural tournament without my help.
Despite my only going to basketball practice 3 or 4 times in the past 2 months, I was still invited to the victory drinking party just now. My main school actually did really well, ending up as the champion for boys basketball, soccer, baseball, table tennis, and a bunch of others. I'm proud of my kids! These days I am getting something out of my job that I never really thought about before, when I was having so much trouble deciding whether or not to continue working in Takahagi. I really feel connected, like I am part of a group, when I go to Takachu. Just now at the drinking party, there were a bunch of speeches given by each sport's coach. Despite my limited involvement they still wanted me to speak. And then we all stood in a circle and put our arms around each other's shoulders and sang the first verse of the school's anthem. Enkai over. Good times.
Despite my only going to basketball practice 3 or 4 times in the past 2 months, I was still invited to the victory drinking party just now. My main school actually did really well, ending up as the champion for boys basketball, soccer, baseball, table tennis, and a bunch of others. I'm proud of my kids! These days I am getting something out of my job that I never really thought about before, when I was having so much trouble deciding whether or not to continue working in Takahagi. I really feel connected, like I am part of a group, when I go to Takachu. Just now at the drinking party, there were a bunch of speeches given by each sport's coach. Despite my limited involvement they still wanted me to speak. And then we all stood in a circle and put our arms around each other's shoulders and sang the first verse of the school's anthem. Enkai over. Good times.
Monday, May 28, 2007
questions and confirmation
In the past couple weeks my job duties have gone a bit downhill. But really, any change was going to be for the worse, since up until now I've been at my main school, my favorite one, every single day for a month. And it was great. I got to be with the new ichinensei from their very first English class, and after two weeks Yatabe sensei, the JTE for the first years, said "they think of you as a regular teacher," which made me quite happy. I also was placed in charge of the new 3rd year select English class. I got to go up with all the normal teachers and explain what the class would be about to all of the sannensei, and then the kids that wanted to be in my class lined up in front of me. That made it a lot easier to figure out who my favorites this year would be. ;)
But, I was informed last week by my BOE that from now on I would be visiting elementary schools at least two days a week, every week. Now, its not that I don't like the kids at elementary school, theyre funny and cute, but I just get tired of spending entire days teaching 10 words over and over, especially when I was just starting to actually matter at takachu.
A lot of that comes from the feeling of belonging at takachu. At takachu, the kids and teachers are used to having me around, and I feel more like a normal teacher, especially this school year for the reasons I said above. Contrast that to every other school I go to. From the moment I walk in the door and say my ohayo gozaimasu, I'm treated as some kind of special guest, offered coffee senbei etc. It's very nice, but it also puts every teacher in the staff room on a "this guy is not one of us" wavelength, and I once again end up suffering through small talk with the same people, again, about how good my Japanese is or how good I am with chopsticks. Thanks.
Of course, there are some things that make me feel good about continuing here. I was walking down the street and saw a group of high school boys. Turns out they were some of my ex students who had just graduated. One of them says to me, "Bryan! Gum! Last piece! For you!" I gladly accepted and wished them all good luck in high school. I saw another ex student at the train station coming from who knows what high school, who wanted to stop me specifically to tell me how much cooler I am than her new ALT. That made me feel good since maybe it means the kids dont like me just because I'm a gaijin. Then, on the day before my current third years went on their school trip, one student came up and asked what I wanted as a souvenir :)
Maybe this will turn out for the better though. I will have more control over what I teach the younger kids, and maybe seeing the teachers at the elementary schools will eventually give me a "normal" teacher status there too. I just gotta work at it! ...still wish I was at takachu every day though.
But, I was informed last week by my BOE that from now on I would be visiting elementary schools at least two days a week, every week. Now, its not that I don't like the kids at elementary school, theyre funny and cute, but I just get tired of spending entire days teaching 10 words over and over, especially when I was just starting to actually matter at takachu.
A lot of that comes from the feeling of belonging at takachu. At takachu, the kids and teachers are used to having me around, and I feel more like a normal teacher, especially this school year for the reasons I said above. Contrast that to every other school I go to. From the moment I walk in the door and say my ohayo gozaimasu, I'm treated as some kind of special guest, offered coffee senbei etc. It's very nice, but it also puts every teacher in the staff room on a "this guy is not one of us" wavelength, and I once again end up suffering through small talk with the same people, again, about how good my Japanese is or how good I am with chopsticks. Thanks.
Of course, there are some things that make me feel good about continuing here. I was walking down the street and saw a group of high school boys. Turns out they were some of my ex students who had just graduated. One of them says to me, "Bryan! Gum! Last piece! For you!" I gladly accepted and wished them all good luck in high school. I saw another ex student at the train station coming from who knows what high school, who wanted to stop me specifically to tell me how much cooler I am than her new ALT. That made me feel good since maybe it means the kids dont like me just because I'm a gaijin. Then, on the day before my current third years went on their school trip, one student came up and asked what I wanted as a souvenir :)
Maybe this will turn out for the better though. I will have more control over what I teach the younger kids, and maybe seeing the teachers at the elementary schools will eventually give me a "normal" teacher status there too. I just gotta work at it! ...still wish I was at takachu every day though.
Wednesday, April 04, 2007
Return
Finally. Last week was a rare opportunity to live completely responsibility free, remain just barely in control, and eat and drink way past my limit, just like I did when I was "studying" here at IES Tokyo 2 years ago. It's no surprise then, that what prompted this backslide into youthful indiscretion was the return of one Ari Dybnis to Japan. I think it's a rule that any time more than 2 of the original A Team get together, chaos and destruction will follow. Me, Ari, and Anthony provided plenty of that last week. Could Japan even survive a full reunion?
So I managed to eventually meet up with Ari after I wrote that last blog post while riding the Joban line. I completely forgot how much taller he is than me, and I relished the opportunity to relinquish my circus sideshow like ability to stand out in Japan. A random waitress even stopped him to ask how tall he was, in English! She had some brass ones lemme tell ya. We met up with Anthony and Blanchard in Chiba, went to perhaps the cheapest nomihoudai ever, and then all night karaoke. I tried to help Brian as he sang/yelled at everyone walking by our room. Unfortunately apparently all that we succeeded in doing was getting some creepy Japanese guy to come over and put crappy music on our machine. That is definitely all I remember that guy doing.
Once the trains started running again we slept at Anthony's for a bit and then went to a Montgomery Flea Market conveniently being held at the Makuhari Messe. At least that's what I think it was called. I spent most of my time looking for a mascot from the 2005 Aichi Expo, but all they had was the same crap over and over, mostly women's clothing and disney stuffed animals. Oh and I seriously considered buying a Land Rover. After an amazing omurice lunch we toured all the arcades of Makuhari, and I got a bit better at the new Initial D game. Met up with Shin san that night, and how awesome is IES when they have a guy like that working there. He's gonna help me out with planning stuff for Ibaraki JETs to do next year. We had a chill time at an izakaya, and it was good to relive memories. Oh plus my phone went off and Shin san recognized the ringer.
After crashing at Anthony's again, I realized that I had left my house 2 days ago with exactly no extra clothes, toiletries, etc. So I had to buy an entire new wardrobe at a 7-11. Ha. And I got a bizarre phone call from one of my JTEs while changing in the bathroom of a Kappa Zushi warning me not to buy a new bike anytime soon. oooooookay.
Monday night? It was what I was waiting for for 2 long years. To finally Return to Y's. More than anything else, going back to that place brought back all the euphoric invincible feelings I had when I was here before. I couldn't stop smiling as soon as I walked in the door. I was also really happy to get to introduce Y's to Jay and Angela, 2 of my best friends here in Ibaraki. It was tough to describe what made Y's so special. Of course 2500 yen for all you can eat and all you can drink for almost 5 friggin hours is awesome. But so much more is tied up into that place for me. I guess Y's just epitomizes what Fall '04 was all about, not caring about anything, least of all how much you've had to drink already. Yeah, so I went a bit overboard last Monday. Ha, I had to. It wouldn't have been a proper return any other way.
I think I knew as soon as I got back to NU after IES that there were certain things that I had lost forever. I had an amazing time not studying at Kanda Gaigo, but all that awaited me were the exponentially tougher classes at Northwestern. I fell hard for a girl that I had an amazingly shallow relationship with in Japan, and then ended up in an incredibly complex relationship with a girl that fell hard for me back home. Study abroad, at least at IES, was nothing close to real life. College already is nothing close to real life, and study abroad doesn't even approach the level of maturity required to graduate from NU. Heh, that's why Shin san will always have a job holding the hands of clueless American "kids" aged 19-22. Given that, getting back to NU, having to actually pay attention and work hard for classes, all to graduate and start looking for an actual job, was a little more than I could handle. I started wanting to go back to Japan almost immediately. That resistance to maturing and entering the real world only brought about negative consequences. I barely passed my remaining courses at NU, graduating but with a demolished GPA, I hurt someone very important to me repeatedly and seriously, and all I had to show for myself after 6 months of looking for a career was a retail job at a store that was going to close after a month.
When I applied for JET, I knew the experience wasn't going to be the same as the last time I was in Japan. I know at least part of me wanted it to be, and still does. That's why I enjoyed myself so much last week. Hell, I'd be willing to put up with an entire year of being bored and isolated in Takahagi for another week like last week in Tokyo. But I have also changed myself, at least in that I can see my life now for what it is. An intermediate step, closer to real life and real responsibilities, but not all the way there yet. Thus my goals from here are twofold: enjoy this almost real life in Japan to its fullest extent, and make sure I am ready to enter the real world back home come the fall of 2008. That will be my next return.
So I managed to eventually meet up with Ari after I wrote that last blog post while riding the Joban line. I completely forgot how much taller he is than me, and I relished the opportunity to relinquish my circus sideshow like ability to stand out in Japan. A random waitress even stopped him to ask how tall he was, in English! She had some brass ones lemme tell ya. We met up with Anthony and Blanchard in Chiba, went to perhaps the cheapest nomihoudai ever, and then all night karaoke. I tried to help Brian as he sang/yelled at everyone walking by our room. Unfortunately apparently all that we succeeded in doing was getting some creepy Japanese guy to come over and put crappy music on our machine. That is definitely all I remember that guy doing.
Once the trains started running again we slept at Anthony's for a bit and then went to a Montgomery Flea Market conveniently being held at the Makuhari Messe. At least that's what I think it was called. I spent most of my time looking for a mascot from the 2005 Aichi Expo, but all they had was the same crap over and over, mostly women's clothing and disney stuffed animals. Oh and I seriously considered buying a Land Rover. After an amazing omurice lunch we toured all the arcades of Makuhari, and I got a bit better at the new Initial D game. Met up with Shin san that night, and how awesome is IES when they have a guy like that working there. He's gonna help me out with planning stuff for Ibaraki JETs to do next year. We had a chill time at an izakaya, and it was good to relive memories. Oh plus my phone went off and Shin san recognized the ringer.
After crashing at Anthony's again, I realized that I had left my house 2 days ago with exactly no extra clothes, toiletries, etc. So I had to buy an entire new wardrobe at a 7-11. Ha. And I got a bizarre phone call from one of my JTEs while changing in the bathroom of a Kappa Zushi warning me not to buy a new bike anytime soon. oooooookay.
Monday night? It was what I was waiting for for 2 long years. To finally Return to Y's. More than anything else, going back to that place brought back all the euphoric invincible feelings I had when I was here before. I couldn't stop smiling as soon as I walked in the door. I was also really happy to get to introduce Y's to Jay and Angela, 2 of my best friends here in Ibaraki. It was tough to describe what made Y's so special. Of course 2500 yen for all you can eat and all you can drink for almost 5 friggin hours is awesome. But so much more is tied up into that place for me. I guess Y's just epitomizes what Fall '04 was all about, not caring about anything, least of all how much you've had to drink already. Yeah, so I went a bit overboard last Monday. Ha, I had to. It wouldn't have been a proper return any other way.
. . .
I think I knew as soon as I got back to NU after IES that there were certain things that I had lost forever. I had an amazing time not studying at Kanda Gaigo, but all that awaited me were the exponentially tougher classes at Northwestern. I fell hard for a girl that I had an amazingly shallow relationship with in Japan, and then ended up in an incredibly complex relationship with a girl that fell hard for me back home. Study abroad, at least at IES, was nothing close to real life. College already is nothing close to real life, and study abroad doesn't even approach the level of maturity required to graduate from NU. Heh, that's why Shin san will always have a job holding the hands of clueless American "kids" aged 19-22. Given that, getting back to NU, having to actually pay attention and work hard for classes, all to graduate and start looking for an actual job, was a little more than I could handle. I started wanting to go back to Japan almost immediately. That resistance to maturing and entering the real world only brought about negative consequences. I barely passed my remaining courses at NU, graduating but with a demolished GPA, I hurt someone very important to me repeatedly and seriously, and all I had to show for myself after 6 months of looking for a career was a retail job at a store that was going to close after a month.
When I applied for JET, I knew the experience wasn't going to be the same as the last time I was in Japan. I know at least part of me wanted it to be, and still does. That's why I enjoyed myself so much last week. Hell, I'd be willing to put up with an entire year of being bored and isolated in Takahagi for another week like last week in Tokyo. But I have also changed myself, at least in that I can see my life now for what it is. An intermediate step, closer to real life and real responsibilities, but not all the way there yet. Thus my goals from here are twofold: enjoy this almost real life in Japan to its fullest extent, and make sure I am ready to enter the real world back home come the fall of 2008. That will be my next return.
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